I am 57. Been around a while.
It’s been a life with a lot of material/Earthly disappointments and failures, and it’s been a life with a lot of spiritual/artistic successes. In other words, I’ve succeeded in the ways that matter, all said and done.
I do have a few regrets, but I didn’t know then what I know now. I regret those things in hindsight.
In High School, I skipped the drugs and alcohol. Instead, I ran 8,000 miles. I went to High School from age 14 to 17, and by the time I was done I’d run a mile in under 5 minutes, 3200 meters in 10:17, and 5000 meters in 17:30. World class high school times? No, I just didn’t have that much talent. Darn good times though. In case you are not familiar, go run a mile on the track and time yourself. Sub 5 is good.
Of course, that was near 40 years ago. A lot has changed with me and my body. I cannot, for numerous reasons, run that fast today.
You know how you hear about old people and their regrets? How they often say they wished they’d just taken chances? Well, I’ve taken some huge chances, and I regret none of them.
As far as activities go, I put music first for years, two different times in my life. I risked it all more than once, and came close to dying more than once. I toured, made albums, and I met some beautiful people.
I was married to someone so interesting that I am not sure there is anyone more interesting on the planet. When we divorced, it crushed me and that crush was my fault. It was great though, because us divorcing was the right thing to do and I got to come face to face with weaknesses that I was unaware I had.
Ever wonder what it’d be like to go vegan? I did it. For 16 years. Raw foodist? Did it. 16 months. Now I eat simple healthy foods (dairy being my weak link, I suppose).
When I decided to move from the campground in Va. Beach to Yogaville in the mountains, I got on a one-speed bike with coaster brakes and rode the 200+ miles to the place.
I’ve lived for a year without electricity (and heat), and for numerous shorter amounts of time when homeless. I say “homeless”, but I had a home. It was a small tent which I would pitch different places, usually close to a road. I’d get my food out of grocery store dumpsters. During this time I walked plenty, and did no drugs or alcohol, as usual.
Should I continue, because there is more.
Seems my adventures ended and my drudgery began when I and my wife split up 17 years ago, but looking back, that is not the case. Yes I finally stopped fighting the whole 9-5 thing and made my peace with it, but that too was a learning experience, and of course this world would not allow me that, as I was fired for doing the right thing, which was refusing those dangerous and ineffective shots. I was ready to go to prison if I had to. I was not, and will not, take those shots. They are not even “vaccines”. If there is one thing I’d like to be known for, it’s for standing up to the bully and refusing those shots.
That cost me my job. I was not earning a lot, $500 a week after taxes, working 40 hours a week, but it was my job. I put myself through security guard school and fire guard classes to get it. Not just to get it, but to even have a chance of getting it. It was a risk I was willing to take, and it paid off. Then, the government interfered. I’ll never trust the government to allow me to work again. I now know they can and will take anything they choose from you at any time.
Like I said, I could go on, but that’ll do, for now anyway.
I may have many years left, but I may not. I am fine either way though. I know I am doing my best. Can you say that, in all honesty? Have you taken the chances you are glad to have taken? Are you living in a way that you can sleep at night, without drugs? Can you walk down the street unashamed of who you have become, of who you are?
Well, I can.
Bring it on.